Wait until you get to gerrymandering and chads. You'll really love the elections then.
Bumper stickers are really fun too, but you all tend to blow your cars up a lot so you'll have to order quite a few of them.
Congratulations -- you're a democracy now!
Regards,
The President
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You would think that with all those multi-millionaires on your team somebody would own their own boat, so you wouldn't have to get in trouble with Al & Alma's Supper Club and Charter Cruises when you want nude lap dances and sex toys on top of the bar.
Party responsibly, please.
Signed,
The President
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What a day. Time for a glass of chocolate milk.
Send up a bottle of Bailey's and a really long straw please.
-P
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So, another one of your priests gets 15 months for possession of child pornography in upstate New York.
Why don't you clean up your own affairs and stay out of our capital punishment cases.
Signed,
The President
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Please stay off the railroad tracks. We've had another Amtrak train slam into a semitrailer in Utah. Frankly I'm tired of seeing this crap.
Again, stay off the railroad tracks and quit driving around the gates and stop trying to commit suicide by Amtrak. They'll kill you in their own way, just buy a ticket.
You people are really irritating.
Signed,
The President
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