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From The Desk Of The President


 To: Postmaster General
 

39 cents.

For what?

-P
Posted by Mr President at 3:48 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 To: Condaleeza Rice, Secretary of State
 

You are so kicking ass. Keep it up.

Now if you can broker a resolution to that South Korea-China kimchi dispute, that would really be stellar.

-P

P.S. I don't care what they say, a Big Mac in Japan tastes different than a Big Mac in the USA.

Posted by Mr President at 3:46 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 To: VP
 

You're right, it is stupid that I would care if there was mail delivery yesterday when I never open it anyway. Who said I can't be funny?

Hey, what's with the "if it changes one life it is worth it" baloney like I heard in the House today? Why are we spending eight billion dollars on a program that only helps one person?

Did you hear Rummy wants to run the office during a lunch hour some time. I think I'll let him do it around the holidays when you know he can't hurt anything.

-P
Posted by Mr President at 3:45 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 To: VP
 

So what's the deal with Veteran's Day? It was Friday? Are we off today? Do we get mail? Is the bank open? I'm so confused.

Now I have to pack for the big Asia trip. I don't mind the chinese food as much, but the sushi, everybody undercooks it so much it's like it's raw.

That's how I like my steak.

-P
Posted by Mr President at 1:50 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 To: Donald Rumsfeld, Secretary of Defense
 

Gee, Rummy, I know you told me some bad things were going on in those Iraqi prisons, but I'm listening to this band you guys had play at Abu Ghraib and they're really horrible. It's like Bob Dylan fronting a punk band doing Beatles covers. This is really painful.

Do you think they could play Guantanamo? Get ahold of their business contact and let me know when they're available and how much they'd want.

-P
Posted by Mr President at 10:28 AM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
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