Psssst...Don't look now but I think the JWits links went away.

-P

So after all that investigation, all that time, all that work, all that hype over Paul Volcker looking into the "Oil-For-Food" baloney, after all of that, a report comes out and the U.N. lacks any authority to do anything about it anyway.

I'd call it a chinese fire drill but it's completely insulting to the chinese.

I'll give you $100 for every desk you tip over at the U.N.

Signed,

The President

P.S. Are you related to Michael Bolton, because you both have really bad hair.

I'm watching the one-minute speeches on the floor of the House. These guys are so bad, they make me miss Jim Traficante.

-P

Half your state has just hosted a Category 3 hurricane. Sorry if we don't have gasoline fully stocked and ready for your vehicle, which I'm sure gets less than 18 miles per gallon. Sorry the clock went out on your DVR and you can't listen to your Jimmy Buffet cd on the computer. I'm sorry you couldn't pass up that last Corona to maybe get some supplies together two weeks ago when we were yapping about this stupid Hurricane Wilma. Sorry we couldn't deliver food and water and ice before the hurricane. Sorry, our bad.

Too bad we don't have any of those Red Cross/FEMA debit cards so you could get a new Louis Vitton purse or a couple of dozen lap dances.

I liked that Bugs Bunny cartoon where he saws off Florida and kicks it into the ocean. A great idea.

Signed,

The President

Happy Birthday!

Signed,

The President