P.P.S. "Deep In The Heart Of Texas," not "Taxes." Sorry.

-P

Hey, how come you make us sit through that dirge "God Bless America" but we don't get to see the happy songs like "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" and "Deep In The Heart of Taxes"?

You guys are killing it.

Signed,

The President

P.S. You guys really need Lou Piniella back in the booth.

I got the report from Security. It turns out that the guy manning the front gate was a Jehovah's Witness, so that's why those JW guys got to the front door last month collecting for The Watchtower. On top of that, he was a U2 fan, so that's why I had Bono knocking on my door looking for lunch.

Time for a new security company. Start taking bids.

-P

Phil, I know you can't close the roof, I was only kidding you. And you can save that kind of language for jawing with the White Sox dugout.

Signed,

The President

P.S. Actually, sorry about last night. I was yelling at you from the third base side because I thought you were yelling at me.

Bob, I'm watching you speak on the Senate floor and you look like one of the guys from Mayberry or someone I'd see at the bus stop.

Didn't you used to be a Klan member? Go home. Have a beer. Retire.

Signed,

The President