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From The Desk Of The President


 To: VP
 

You know, in some parts of the world, when they eat a duck or goose they pour the raw blood into a kind of saucer and use it as a "blood pudding." It's supposed to be really good.

And they wonder why they get sick.

-P

P.S. So...how's your bird?
Posted by Mr President at 12:19 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 To: U.S. Congress
 

I see that you have finally decided that fire sprinklers should perhaps be mandatory in nursing homes. You thoughtful people you.

Why don't you take a break from telling us if we can smoke a cigarette and when we can have a baby and do something useful.

*Yawn*

The President
Posted by Mr President at 12:05 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 To: VP
 

Chris Jansing on MSNBC is looking very cuddly today in her turtleneck and dress jacket.

I can't wait to drink hot cocoa with her and ice skate at Rockefeller Center.

-P
Posted by Mr President at 12:01 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 To: Fox News
 

I'm not sure I understand, so maybe you can help me.

If you report on a series of explosions at a hotel in Baghdad and first you say it's three car bombs, then it's two rocket explosions and a car bomb, and then it's you're not sure and you're working on clarifying it, why not at some point just say "exact cause unknown" and tell us when you find out for sure. I don't know why that annoys me so much, but it does. That and your eye candy dish is empty.

Signed,

The President
Posted by Mr President at 11:41 AM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 To: National Hurricane Center
 

Really, so now it's on to naming hurricanes with the Greek alphabet now. Couldn't we find some other way to do it? "Hurricane Alpha" just doesn't seem right.

The President
Posted by Mr President at 11:08 AM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
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Author: Mr President
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